Dear readers,Joy to the world is the message of Christmas,but our writer was denied this joy 17 years ago.As if that was not enough, history isabout repeating itself. He needs your adviceMonica Taiwo.Dear Taiwo, I am not one of those people who believe in coincidence. I have never been a student of that school of thought, and I sincerely wonder why the event I am about to narrate, which I want you to counsel me on is happening just a few weeks to Christmas like it did precisely 17 years ago.Exactly two weeks before Christmas, my wedded wife, Adun, left me. Just like her name, before she left, she was the spice of my life. Whenever I was with her, I forgot every worry and trouble. She equally gave me two beautiful gifts no one else could give. God Almighty gave me two wonderful children through her.Our home and/or marriage was the envy of everyone who knew us until I lost my job, and couldn't find another one for over one year.The joy in my marriage disappeared because my wife of seven years could not bear with me.I was, however, happy that she did not take my children away. They remained my source of joy up till today and it was because of them that I made up mind not to re-marry because I cannot stand any woman maltreating my gems.Adun and I met when we were in the university. We were at the same level, but not in the same school. She studied Sociology while I read Accounting. We met during a sporting event, though we were supposed to be on opposite sides, supporting our schools' team but funny enough we both supported my team and we won.I later invited her to have a drink on me to celebrate our victory and that was how our relationship started.We graduated the same year and went for the youth service. Funny enough, she did her service in Lagos, while I was posted to Maiduguri. Throughout my service year, I did not travel down South more than twice but we still maintained our relationship and I guessed the distance really helped our relationship. In Maiduguri, I served in a bank, and probably because of my disposition towards things, hard work and luck, I was given a permanent appointment.Maiduguri was too far from home, and I complained to the branch manager who incidentally was a Yoruba man, and who advised that I should work for some months and them seek for transfer to whereever I wanted.I took his advice and worked for seven months, and sought a transfer to Lagos. Instead of being transferred to Lagos, I was transferred to Ilorin, where I spent another four years.All through these times, Adun stood by me. Our love grew stronger and we started our wedding plans. She stayed in Lagos with her parents and she equally got a job with a bank in Lagos. All the while that I was out of Lagos, she met my parents and they really loved her and vice versa. We really loved each other, I must confess that I really did not know what went wrong and why she decided to leave when she did.We got married when I was at the Ilorin branch of my office and luckily for me, I was transferred to Lagos two months after my marriage. Just before we got married, Adun left the banking job for a better one, with an internationally sponsored non-governmental organisation (NGO), which had monetary grants to work on eradicating maternal mortality and morbidity from USAID. I felt better because I was concerned about how she would cope when our children started coming.Her job was a good one; the only thing, I really did not like about it was that she travelled a lot; but fortunately, her trips reduced the moment it was obvious she was pregnant. Our two children came in quick succession. Our son came exactly a year and two months after his sister who is our first child. I give glory to God for the gift of these two wonderful gems.
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