Dear readers,Here is the concluding part of last weeks story. Our writer is eagerly waiting for your response and advice.Please, read, your counsel is appreciated.Thanks, Monica Taiwo.(Continued from last week)Dear Taiwo,In a situation like this, I definitely would have looked up to him for support, but that I have not been able to get from him because he had become a drunk. He would beat me at every opportunity and to crown it all, he would also accuse me of not being able to have children, despite the fact that he knew that he was the reason for our childlessness.But I tried to be calm, but she wouldnt let me be. She provoked me to the level that I told her that I was not God and that He would give me children at His own time. She did not hesitate to tell my husband, when he came from the office that I was rude to her.Without finding out what happened, my husband pounced on me and beat me. My mother had died few years before this time, and my other siblings had asked that I quit the marriage, but I refused. It was a situation of being alone in the whole world, but I kept holding on to Gods promise that there wont be anyone barren in His land.I went to work the following day because I was expecting an important client. I tried to look cheerful, but all my make-up couldnt cover my bitterness.My client came in promptly at 9 a.m and his first comment shocked me. He wanted to know why I looked that way and said I should have informed him before coming that I wasnt okay. I tried to pretend all was well, but I couldnt manage it.I broke down and wept in his presence. He was a kind man who encouraged me to talk. I told him all I was going through; I couldnt hold back all I had bottled up inside me except the fact that my husband was the root cause, because as of then, I didnt know. One thing led to another, and before I knew it, I had started dating him.He was a businessman who travelled out of the country a lot of times. A happily married man with three children, but he made me happy. I couldnt help finding solace and peace in his arms.Two months into my affairs with him, I became pregnant. Initially, I never knew I was pregnant; it was strange, (10 years after I was deflowered) I had no symptoms of the first trimester. I discovered I was pregnant when the pregnancy was over 12 weeks; probably, I would have thought of doing something silly because of the shock; but my husband was right there when the doctor gave me the news of my pregnancy. I didnt know what to make of it.All along, I never knew he could not father children. It was the miracle we have been waiting for. Every one who heard was happy for me. My husband became a changed man, my mother-in-law started treating me like her own daughter. But I was afraid; I was not comfortable. My friend was away on business trip and I called him to inform him. He said I should keep my peace, that he was sure the pregnancy was his, but that he wouldnt trouble me.I had a baby boy; my apprehension almost ran me into trouble just before I gave birth to the boy. I was worried, what if the baby looked like someone else. God however, was magnanimous as my son was my exact carbon copy. Every one rejoiced at his birth and peace returned to my home.My friend came back from overseas business trip when my son was about four months. We had sex again and to my surprise, it led to another pregnancy, which brought forth another boy. I was, however, convinced without doubt that both of them were his.You wont believe that I had to take a DNA test to confirm and my suspicion was confirmed. When I told (their father), his response was that he had no intention of disrupting his home and mine and that I could keep my children, but that he would love to be part of their lives. Since then, he pays their fees and carries out every fatherly responsibility. In fact, he facilitated my whole familys relocation to the US.We normally visited home and it was during one of my trips home without my husband that I discovered the secret he had kept from me for more than a decade. I was looking for some documents when I stumbled on a medical report which confirmed that he cannot father children; I was shocked, but I had no guts to confront him with this fact when I returned to the US because of my own secret too.I told the father of my children about my findings. He advised that I keep quiet and not disturb the delicate peace in my home. We have ceased to have any intimate relationship, but we remained friends.Aside caring for his children he has been really good. His children have his kind heart. I dont know what to do. This guilt is killing me. I couldnt even tell my friend who advised that I should tell you.Moreso, my husband knows that he cannot father children, yet he is not asking me questions.Please, Monica Taiwo, what do I do with this burden in my heart Help! please.Anonymous.
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