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Am I asking for too much

Published by Tribune on Mon, 21 Mar 2011


No doubt, in just two days time, 2010 will be a past tense. Differ-ent people have different feelings and reasons to thank God for, count their blessings, hope, look forward and what have you to the end of the year and a bright dawn in 2011.For others, the end of the year is full of apprehension, and sorrow.I wont say I have a sad perception of this season, and like everyone I definitely have a lot to thank God for in this fast fading year. To say I have no reason to thank God would amount to being ungrateful, he has been kind and gracious towards me, but like the proverbial Oliver Twist, God I want more. I want above all things to be happy, Father Lord, I want the joy of a holy matrimony, I want my own husband, I want my own home.Many of you reading this may wonder why or some would even think I am desperate. If you feel that way, you probably are not very far from the truth but believe me having a husband and a home of my own will give me great joy.I have been through several relationships; failed ones. I have never been short of the company of the opposite sex and neither have I have been short of admirers, but the problem is, more of these relationships terminate  into the expected end.I am not growing any younger, I am closer to 40, even more than I think and like the common knowledge, experiencing the joy of motherhood could be another issue as I never prayed to have a child outside wedlock.As I stated earlier, I have never been short of admirers. Precisely nine months ago, a friend of mine matched my current boyfriend and I, she meant well. She is a close friend to the two of us and because she is quite familiar with where we were coming from and what we have been through in the hands of the opposite sex.Well, we met and jelled!We started a relationship and the chemistry (sexual and others) are right. Although on certain issues, I have my reservations about Felix but I guess these are things that I could change or persuade him about over time.For one, Felix although a chief executive officer in his place of work is not particularly bothered about his appearance and what he wears.To a very large extent, I could say he is unkempt and cares less about personal hygiene. Whenever I tried  to correct him, he puts up a defence and tunes off from me. He does not like me correcting him.I stay out of town and once in a while when I come to town for the weekend, all I do for him is clean the house, wash his clothes and make him food.I have also discovered that he is not romantic and very reserved. He does not share anything with me and he prefers to read the dailies and watch television to speaking with me. Sometimes, his silence bothers me. I want to be a part of him, I want to share his joys and worries, but he is not ready to share with me.Sometimes, I have the feelings that I am asking for too much in such a short time, and he gets me very confused.Whenever I raise my  fears with my friend, her reply is always You need to give him time because of where he is coming from and his past experiences. For crying out loud, I had bitter experiences too. I had a past with men too. I have been hurt, broken hearted and made extremely miserable before too. I am being careful not to allow my past relationship to affect my dealings with him. I am of the opinion that he is not making this effort.Taiwo, am I asking for too much Would this relationship give me my desireHow do I handle it I love him and I know he feels the same way about me, but how do I get him to show me how he feels His reaction is giving me fears. I really want to make this relationship work and lead to the altar. Please, how do I or am I overstretching my luck What does next year have in stock for me in the field of matrimonial joy I am afraid and apprehensive, somebody help me.Worried lady
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