<p><img src="https://static2.businessinsider.com/image/5ec410de5af6cc625c3ddd46-2400/laura-grace-tarpley-nashville.jpg" border="0" alt="Laura Grace Tarpley Nashville" data-mce-source="Laura Grace Tarpley" data-mce-caption="The author in her current city of residence, Nashville."></p><p></p><bi-shortcode id="summary-shortcode" data-type="summary-shortcode" class="mceNonEditable" contenteditable="false">Summary List Placement</bi-shortcode><ul class="summary-list"><li>Dave Ramsey's strict money rules were my only exposure to personal finance until my 20s.</li><li>I've realized that the teachings no longer fit my needs anymore.</li><li>It's important to look to experts for financial guidance, but money issues aren't black and white.</li><li><a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/best-personal-finance-books" target="_blank" rel="noopener">See Insider's picks for the best personal finance books</a></li></ul><p>Growing up, I didn't <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/my-parents-best-money-advice-for-my-whole-life-2019-7" target="_blank" rel="noopener">ask my parents about personal finance</a> very often. (We weren't as open about sensitive topics like money back then as we are now.) But I had a natural interest in the subject, so I set out to learn more during high school.</p><p>During my sophomore year, I enrolled in a personal finance class at my Christian high school. Then I attended a money seminar at my friends' youth group my junior year.</p><p>Both the Christian school and non-denominational church turned to one famous author to teach teens about money: <a href="https://www.daveramsey.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Dave Ramsey</a>.</p><p>Dave Ramsey is a popular businessman with a radio show and numerous books about personal finance. His show and publications aren't exclusively for Christians, but his identity as an Evangelical Christian is a defining aspect of his brand.</p><p>For years, Dave Ramsey was the main person I looked to for financial advice. <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/save-money-without-budget-2019-4" target="_blank" rel="noopener">But in my 20s</a>, I realized something: Ramsey's values didn't align with my own anymore. As I had grown up, my worldview had changedso why was my main financial mentor still the same person I had looked to when I was 16'</p><div><style> #div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-0 > div > iframe { width: 100% !important; min-width: 300px; max-width: 595px; } </style><script async src="https://securepubads.g.doubleclick.net/tag/js/gpt.js"></script><script> window.googletag = window.googletag || { cmd: [] }; googletag.cmd.push(function () { googletag.defineSlot('/1035677/Business_Insider_', [[1, 1], [300, 139], [595, 139], [300, 250], [595, 250], [300, 360], [595, 360], [300, 475], [595, 475]], 'div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-0') .addService(googletag.pubads()); googletag.pubads().enableSingleRequest(); googletag.pubads().setTargeting('category', ["Banking"]).setTargeting('subcat', ["Savings Accounts"]).setTargeting('post_id', []) .setTargeting('post_url', []) .setTargeting('keyword', []) .setTargeting('company-product', []) .setTargeting('post_title', []); googletag.enableServices(); }); </script><!-- /1035677/Business_Insider_ --><div id="div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-0"> <script> googletag.cmd.push(function () { googletag.display('div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-0'); }); </script></div></div><h2>Dave Ramsey has strict rules about money</h2><p>Dave Ramsey has <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/dave-ramsey-financial-peace-university-what-you-learn" target="_blank" rel="noopener">seven steps for getting out of debt and building wealth</a>, and they are designed to be followed in order. Here are what he refers to as the seven "Baby Steps":</p><p>1. Save $1,000 to begin your <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/what-is-an-emergency-fund" target="_blank" rel="noopener">emergency fund</a></p><p>2. <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/spreadsheet-snowball-method-pay-off-debt-2017-2" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Use the snowball method</a> to pay off all debt, excluding your mortgage</p><p>3. Save three to six months of expenses in the emergency fund</p><p>4. Invest 15% of your income in a retirement fund</p><p>5. Save for your children's college educations</p><p>6. <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/pay-off-mortgage-early" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Pay off your mortgage early</a></p><p>7. Build wealth and give to others</p><p>One of Ramsey's most popular books, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00DNBE8P6/ref=as_li_tl'ie=UTF8&tag=bipfi_051920_money-experts-dave-ramsey-financial-advice-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B00DNBE8P6&linkId=60e17e8bce5aaec3e85a03d8d2a0b174" target="_blank" rel="noopener nofollow sponsored nofollow sponsored">"Total Money Makeover,"</a> explains these steps in-depth. When you read <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00DNBE8P6/ref=as_li_tl'ie=UTF8&tag=bipfi_051920_money-experts-dave-ramsey-financial-advice-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B00DNBE8P6&linkId=60e17e8bce5aaec3e85a03d8d2a0b174" target="_blank" rel="noopener nofollow sponsored nofollow sponsored">"Total Money Makeover,"</a> you'll also learn that Ramsey has an <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/cutting-up-my-credit-cards-didnt-help-me-pay-off-debt" target="_blank" rel="noopener">inflexible no-credit-cards rule</a>.</p><p>In fact, Ramsey doesn't believe you need a credit score at all. (Although if you've already developed a <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/what-is-a-bad-credit-score" target="_blank" rel="noopener">bad score</a>, he does say you should work to improve it.) If you want to buy or rent something that requires a credit check, you should show other proof that you're financially responsible.</p><p>I didn't understand the significance of some of Ramsey's stances in high school. I was still a minor, I didn't have any personal debt yet, and I had no plans to buy a home anytime soon. I didn't use his rules to make repairs to my financesbut I did look to them for preventative maintenance.</p><h2>My personal and financial values have changed with age</h2><p>Starting my financial education like that has benefited me in some ways over the years.</p><p>For example, learning about the dangers of high-interest credit card debt scared me off getting a card until I was in my mid-20s. (Sorry, Dave, I still ended up <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/best-credit-cards" target="_blank" rel="noopener">getting a credit card</a>! But at least I waited until I was old enough to understand how debt works ... right')</p><p>Ramsey's warnings against debt also helped me steer clear of going into student loan debt. Unlike many 18-year-olds applying to colleges, I had a decent understanding of how student loans worked. So I chose to attend a college that wasn't my first choice, but offered me a significant academic scholarship.</p><p>I kept those teachings in the back of my mind for over a decade, until I finally reread <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00DNBE8P6/ref=as_li_tl'ie=UTF8&tag=bipfi_051920_money-experts-dave-ramsey-financial-advice-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B00DNBE8P6&linkId=60e17e8bce5aaec3e85a03d8d2a0b174" target="_blank" rel="noopener nofollow sponsored">"Total Money Makeover"</a> in 2019. That's when I realized something: His baby steps just weren't the right fit for me anymore. I also have no problem putting expenses on a credit card and immediately paying it off so <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/best-travel-rewards-credit-cards" target="_blank" rel="noopener">I can accumulate travel points</a>.</p><p>Now that I'm in my late 20s, I've decided to build an emergency fund <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/how-much-money-to-save-in-emergency-fund-rules" target="_blank" rel="noopener">with at least three months of expenses</a> (instead of Ramsey's recommended $1,000) before tackling lower-interest debt, such as student loan payments. I've also learned through trial and error that <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/how-to-get-out-of-debt-snowball-vs-debt-avalanche" target="_blank" rel="noopener">the debt avalanche method</a> can motivate me better than the debt snowball method.</p><p>Although I avoided student loans for my undergraduate education, my husband and I agreed to take out loans for him to attend graduate school. After weighing the pros and cons, we decided it would be worth the expense for his career.</p><p>I also want to invest more than 15% of my income for retirement, and I haven't decided <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/why-im-prioritizing-retirement-over-my-kids-college" target="_blank" rel="noopener">whether I want to pay for my future kids to attend college</a>, should they choose to attend.</p><aside class="quick-tip headline-regular"><p><strong>I'm not the same person I was at age 16, so my approach to personal finance doesn't need to be the same, either.</strong></p></aside><p>I don't necessarily think Ramsey's Baby Steps are bad advice. But I'm coming to terms with the fact that they aren't the end-all, be-all guidelines for financial success, which was the message I personally took away from my finance classes in high school.</p><p>Looking back, my view of those teachings aligned with the brand of religion I was raised with. Everything was black and whitethere was a right way and a wrong way to go about practically every decision, and if you chose the wrong way, you'd have to face the consequences.</p><p>Ramsey's discouragement from doing what everyone else is doing also appealed to my high school social group. As Christian teens, we were taught that the world would be full of temptation, and we'd have to resist the urge to sin. Just because everyone else was doing something didn't mean we should do it. On the contrary, it probably meant we shouldn't.</p><p>Don't do what everyone else is doing. You don't need to do what the "bad kids" do (or use a credit card). You can have fun (or buy a house) without doing what everyone else does (having a credit score).</p><p>I definitely learned some good priorities with my Christian education growing up. However, I'm not particularly religious anymore. At the very least, I don't subscribe to the brand of Christianity I grew up following.</p><p>The ideas of black versus white, right versus wrong, and the "don't trust what the world is doing" mindset don't match my worldview anymore, so it doesn't make sense for me to view finances this way, either.</p><h2>Find a financial expert whose money values match yours</h2><div><style> #div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-4 > div > iframe { width: 100% !important; min-width: 300px; max-width: 595px; } </style><script async src="https://securepubads.g.doubleclick.net/tag/js/gpt.js"></script><script> window.googletag = window.googletag || { cmd: [] }; googletag.cmd.push(function () { googletag.defineSlot('/1035677/Business_Insider_', [[1, 1], [300, 139], [595, 139], [300, 250], [595, 250], [300, 360], [595, 360], [300, 475], [595, 475]], 'div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-4') .addService(googletag.pubads()); googletag.pubads().enableSingleRequest(); googletag.pubads().setTargeting('category', ["Financial Planning"]).setTargeting('subcat', []).setTargeting('post_id', []) .setTargeting('post_url', []) .setTargeting('keyword', []) .setTargeting('company-product', []) .setTargeting('post_title', []); googletag.enableServices(); }); </script><!-- /1035677/Business_Insider_ --><div id="div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-4"> <script> googletag.cmd.push(function () { googletag.display('div-gpt-ad-1579713650634-4'); }); </script></div></div><p>Don't get me wrongI'm not against turning to a financial authors for help. Actually, it's the exact opposite. <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/best-personal-finance-books" target="_blank" rel="noopener">I love reading financial books</a>, articles, and blogs.</p><p>And if people decide Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps are the best tools for achieving their definition of financial success, then more power to them.</p><p>In my case, I found other experts who inspired me. After reading <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0451499085/ref=as_li_tl'ie=UTF8&tag=bipfi_051920_money-experts-dave-ramsey-financial-advice-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=0451499085&linkId=34b44005f50a904031ad3ee211da7258" target="_blank" rel="noopener nofollow sponsored nofollow sponsored">"The Automatic Millionaire"</a> by <a href="https://davidbach.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">David Bach</a>, I set up automatic payments and savings so I wouldn't have to do anything manually. This strategy has saved me a lot of time and stress, as well as helped me save without even realizing it. It's like finding $20 in your winter coat when you put it on for the first time in six months.</p><p>More recently, I've started reading <a href="https://www.suzeorman.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Suze Orman</a> literature, including <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1594482241/ref=as_li_tl'ie=UTF8&tag=bipfi_051920_money-experts-dave-ramsey-financial-advice-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=1594482241&linkId=794574de4be2c9aabd71cdcbceb11976" target="_blank" rel="noopener nofollow sponsored nofollow sponsored">"The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke."</a> Yes, she was more famous a decade or so ago, but I was still looking solely to Dave Ramsey back then, so I'm catching up.</p><p>Like Ramsey, Orman teaches some strict money rules. But hers revolve around <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/suze-orman-emergency-fund-covid-19-2020-6" target="_blank" rel="noopener">saving more than eight months of expenses in an emergency fund</a> and focusing on <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/how-to-improve-credit-score" target="_blank" rel="noopener">building your credit score</a>. Her tips and insights fit my values, and they've challenged me with different ways of thinking.</p><p>Over the years, I've had to learn that the world isn't as black-and-white as I once thought. Similarly, there's no one-size-fits-all formula for becoming financially successful. It's okay that my values and goals are changing. But I also need to remind myself that it can be just as acceptable for others' priorities to look like mine did when I was 16.</p><p><em>Laura Grace Tarpley is the associate editor of banking and mortgages at Personal Finance Insider, covering mortgages, refinancing, bank accounts, and bank reviews. She is also a Certified Educator in Personal Finance (CEPF). Over her four years of covering personal finance, she has written extensively about ways to save, invest, and navigate loans.</em></p><ul class="read-more-links"><li><bi-shortcode id="related-content-module" class="mceNonEditable" data-type="more-personal-finance-coverage" data-sheetname="More Personal Finance Coverage">Related Content Module: More Personal Finance Coverage</bi-shortcode></li></ul><p><a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/money-experts-dave-ramsey-financial-advice-2020-5#comments">Join the conversation about this story »</a></p>
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