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Am I Being Manipulated' - Is Her Anger Justified

Published by Nairaland on Sun, 22 Jan 2023

Hi guys,<br>I need your advice on this. It is causing issues in my 2 years relationship.<br>I came to Lagos in 2018 after my NYSC. Prior to that, I had plans for my older sister to come stay with me, considering how difficult things were.<br>Note that my married eldest brother was in Lagos before then. I understand that maybe he needs his privacy, but he didn't help in any way (he didn't have to).<br><br>When I got the apartment, I met my girlfriend while she was serving in Lagos. My older sister has yet to move in with me, but I have mentioned to her not once but twice that she will soon come and live with me.<br><br>I will also like to mention that my elder sister was living with her boyfriend before I came to Lagos. This doesn't seem right to me or to her.<br><br>She moved in, and we were living together peacefully. Along the way, she broke up with her boyfriend.About 6 months later, she got into another relationship. The man seems interested in marrying her. And they were making plans for settling down. Unfortunately, she got pregnant out of wedlock for the man. She had to move in with the man.<br><br>Now this is where the issues begin. After a few months (after her childbirth), they always have issues. They go on and off. Two times they had issues; she carried her bag and came to my place. Two times it happened, and she stayed with me for not more than two months put together. This didn't go well with my girlfriend. She complained that my sister is always in the picture, and she doesn't like that.<br><br>The third time, the man abused my sister, and he beat her up. I went to the man's house with my &quot;married eldest brother.&quot; We fought with the man and threatened to arrest him. He pleaded, plus the neighbors and the landlord too.That night, we took my sister away from him. My sister chose to stay at my place until she gets an apartment for herself and her kid.<br><br>This really annoyed my girlfriend. She always says things like, &quot;My family does not respect me.&quot; That's why my sister can move in to my house knowing that I am in a relationship.<br>&quot;Why does she like to stay with me and not my brother'&quot; &quot;Why do I have to always be the one to bear the burden'&quot; Note that my sister works, and she can take care of herself and her kid. She just needed a place to stay until she got her own apartment.<br><br>She feared that my sister could just move in with her bags when we get married, which I have assured her is not possible.<br>She claims she likes her space and all. She claims she doesn't like the &quot;on and off&quot; as sometimes she may want to spend a &quot;lone&quot; time with me. Spend weekends... and this won't be possible when my sister is around.<br>She claims that she has never seen a scenario where an older sister with a kid is leaving with younger brother.<br>She always give instances where she has never seen guys in relationships allow their older sister to come stay with them.<br>She claimed that sometimes I should &quot;man up&quot; and say NO to her.<br><br>Is she overreacting' What did I do wrong in all of this' Am I being manipulated' Is her anger justified'<br><br>N.B My sister has gotten a place for herself and has moved out.
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