The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant ' but succinct ' wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this weeks great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.I slept 15 hours last night. I took Benadryl and Benadryl took me. Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) March 3, 2017 Since I can't be sure when the midpoint of my life really is, I just have my crisis on a daily basis to make sure that I never miss out. Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) February 28, 2017 I'd love to have kids so I could blame my lack of sleep on them. Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) March 1, 2017 sweetgreen: ur salad will be ready at 1:45 pm ~1:46 pm~ me: 911 THIS IS AN EMERGENCY I DON'T SEE MY SALAD Taylor Trudon (@taylortrudon) February 28, 2017 Have you ever been early to something' People are calm and smiling, it's crazy. Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) March 1, 2017 breaking image of jeff sessions getting arrested for treason pic.twitter.com/pbcmC1gVae INVISIGOTH (@spacecrone) March 2, 2017 me, watching great british bake show: nancy's gonna win this thing isnt she what an airy ciabattaupstairs neighbors, having sex: *sex* Julia Bush (@jabush) March 2, 2017 My new favorite game to play... Is that lingering car my uber or my murderer' Calise Hawkins (@CaliseHawkins) February 26, 2017 Last night I dreamt that I had a pimple on my shoulder so I squeezed it and slowly two glass Coke bottles emerged and I bled to death. Coke Amanda M-W (@Manda_like_wine) March 2, 2017 Each presidential spelling error creates a copy editor job in a factory in the Midwest. Kashana (@kashanacauley) March 3, 2017 It must be amazing to wake up and want to leave your house. Jenni Konner (@JenniKonner) March 3, 2017 from left to right: me on twitter, facebook, tumblr, instagram, and linkedin pic.twitter.com/sLDFpPsgzk Michelle Lee (@heymichellelee) February 26, 2017 Convo-Him: Can u explain the Oscar thing to me'Me: Yep. We got a crazy man Moonlighting as President. It feels like we live in La La Land. Ana Navarro (@ananavarro) February 27, 2017 my mama just told me she doesnt like mexican food so im officially up for adoption Tracy Clayton (@brokeymcpoverty) March 2, 2017 Recusing, but for Lent Margarita Noriega (@margarita) March 2, 2017 A bot that quote-tweets all of @realDonaldTrump's tweets with just "lol" Ashley Alman (@ashleyalman) March 3, 2017 I've been having an existential breakdown since learning I give off a "from Connecticut" vibe one hour ago Gabby Noone (@twelveoclocke) March 2, 2017 maybe he'll like me after the apocalypse: an essay keely flaherty (@flahertykeely) March 1, 2017 Trump ends most of his tweets with exclamation points because he thinks periods are gross. OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) February 25, 2017 A handbag is my favorite way to carry around fourteen crumpled grocery receipts and an old almond. Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) March 2, 2017 -- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Click here to read full news..
