6 proven ways to get over a breakup

Going through a break up can be challenging. Whether or not you were the instigator,the pain of moving on is hardto handle.Since relationships arent one size fits all, people reactin different ways. Thats why its so difficult to narrow down a single cure for heartache. But dont fret while there may not be a easy fix, there are tips and tricks that the professionals swear by.As psychologists working in New York City, Dr. Karen Weinstein and Dr. Michael Zentman haveseen theirfair share of patients battling through a break up. Theydon'tclaim to have all the answers, but they do have general sense of how to help people heal a whole quicker.Here are six ways to get over a break up:1. Ditch the rose-colored glasses."Reflect on the relationshipfor what it was, likely it was neither all good nor all bad," Dr.Weinsteinsuggests. "Resist the commontendency to idealize the relationship. It's very common to only recall and focus on the wonderful aspects of the relationship. This makes it even harder to accept the reality that it's over and is the equivalent of'denial' in the stages of grief."One way to reflect would be to make a list of things you weren't happy with in the relationship. By the end, you might realize that the separation was for the best.2. Pick up your reading glasses.Another tip from Dr. Weinstein, albeit slightly cheesy, is to hit up the self-help section. She recommendsthe books "It's Called A Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Breakup Buddy" by Greg and Amiira Behrendt as well as "Don't Call That Man!" (revised under the more contemporarytitle "Don't Text That Man!") by Rhonda Findling."The whole field of self help books does seem to assume that only women struggle with breakups, which is far from the reality," she admitted. "Regardless, there are some thoughtful gems of advice and support in [these books]."3. Talk it out."The best thing someone can do is talk about their feelings about the loss with close friends and other loved ones," Dr. Zentman says. "Hearing yourself say how youre feeling and having a witness can be very helpful."Grab drinks or dinner with a close friendwho's willing to listen for a while and see where the conversation leads you. You may even learn something about yourself."There will be much wisdom to gain if a person can be self-reflective and figure out what they contributed to the breakup," Dr. Zentman adds.See the rest of the story at Business Insider
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